An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

Two black guys walked into a bar. And they killed everybody.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

nick walked into macdonalds... everyone stood up and left as they saw the potential danger in the situation.. nick later ended up bieng hit by a bus after chasing a duck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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