One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

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how man

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Why were the Jews stuck in Germany? Because Joseph Rosenstein and his Jewish family missed their train out of Frankfurt to go to Paris, and so they had to stay another night in their hotel.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

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Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

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What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

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You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

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What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

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you know whats worse than cantaloupe? no cantaloupe

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What do an airplane and a strawberry have in common? They can both fly.... Except for the strawberry

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

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Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's orange and sticky? An orange. What's red and sticky? My stool - is that normal?

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How do you stop a baby from making bad grades? You throw a javelin at its head.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alan okay come in

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

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Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops