What's worse than AIDS Nothing can possibly be worse than finding out you have AIDS

What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

Charlie Sheen Walks Into a Rehab Center.....

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

Q: What did the banana say as it was being eaten? A: Nothing. Bananas are inanimate objects and therefore are incapable of talking.

Why did chuck norris die Brain tumor

How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

Whats Pink and fluffy? Yellow fluff thats been dyed pink :D

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

Q: How did the robber steal a laptop from best buy? A: With his hands

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

the lemon was sweet.

What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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