Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The Duck walks up to the lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand...Hey bum bum bum....How much is the lemonade

thumb_up thumb_down +3

My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the student say to the teacher, after being assigned homework? This isn't my best subject, can I stay after class for tutoring?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So there's this girl who really wanted red socks. She goes to the store, socks are $2. Well, that sucks, she thinks. I only have $1. So she goes home and asks her mom for a buck. Sure, the mom replies. I'll give you a buck if you fix my vacuum cleaner. So the girl fixes the vacuum cleaner, mom giver her the buck. The girl goes to the store, but wait. Socks are $3 now. Girl goes home, asks her dad for a buck. Sure, the dad replies. I'll give you a buck if you fix my car. Girl fixes car, dad gives het a buck. Girls goes to store.Well damn, the socks are $4 now. She goes home and asks her brother for a buck. Sure, her brother replies. I'll give you a buck if you fix my computer. Girl fixes computer, brother giver her a buck. Girl goes to store and FINALLY buys the socks. She comes home. Mother dead. Vacuum cleaner exploded. For 1 month the girl mourns her mom. Finally she can wear her socks. Ah crap, car accident. After 1 month mourning her dad she can finally wear the socks. Well, turns out she can't. Brother dead cause of exploded computer. After yet another month of mourning, she can FINALLY wear her red socks. So she does. Suddenly the doorbell rings. The girl opens the door and there's a polar bear standing in front of her. What did the polar bear say? WELL NOTHING, BECAUSE POLAR BEARS CANNOT TALK!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Hello everyone, if you couldnt tell, the most popular joke was removed because it wasnt even an antijoke, if you have a joke that isnt an antijoke, post it somewhere else, if you dont know what an antijoke even is then get the f*ck out, thumbs up if you agree with me

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's black, white and red all over? A race war

thumb_up thumb_down +3

"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Women's Rights..

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops