A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

What's worse than the Holocaust? This joke.

Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

yo momma is so fat she ate the rest of the joke

We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

Why did the blond fall down? She died.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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