How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

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Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

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There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

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If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

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Beached whale: "Look at me, I'm a land mammal"

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If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I forgot the rest, Don't laugh at me...

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Why did the little boy wipe his face with a towel? It was covered with his dog's blood after getting hit by a bus.

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your mum

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

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Why did the little girl miss 7 straight days of school? She died.

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What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb??? I don't know don't ask me when I'm asking you the question!!!

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. He is soon kicked out as he is underage.

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Knock knock Who's There Sally Sally who? Sally who .got hit with a fridge and fell off a tree because I have no arms. Sorry, I do not know you.

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Not Ann Frank because she died in the Holocaust along with 6 million other innocent people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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