What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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When life throws you lemons, your first instinct is to make lemonade. Due to your severe lemon allergy, however, you will die within several minutes and therefore have no viable method of creating said lemonade. You die horribly and your death sparks a movement against the biological warfare of life.

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A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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I don't get it

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

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How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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Your big dick.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy! But here's my switchblade Get in the trunk.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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drugs.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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