what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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An alien just ate your family and all of the things you love

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

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Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

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How do you kill a deer? You don't, you just let it be because that's what a decent human being would do.

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Why was the woman happy to give birth to a beautiful, healthy child? Just kidding, she had an abortion.

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Why did the duck eat the fish? It needed protein.

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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Why did the little girl fall to death? Because pigs can't fly. It's impossible.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

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what are you mike bibby?

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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wsde

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

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Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

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roses are red violets are blue i killed your family

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops