What did the magician say to the little boy after he "cut" his mother in half. She is dead now. Your dad is on Row 4, he is crying.

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ert

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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WHAT THE BABIES?!

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They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

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"I have a job perfromance review today!" Earl told his wife. "Good luck, I will make you a special dinner tonight," Melinda, his wife, responded.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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You know what they say about priests with big rosaries? I don't know, it's in Latin.

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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Hitler walks into a temple..... Oh wait he died

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What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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