A man walks into a bar. It turns out he's an alcoholic, and he goes home and beats his wife.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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A guy walks into a bar. NOT!

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Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

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What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

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Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

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why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

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A shark ate your mom

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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Take wrong turns

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Q: how do you drown a blond A: put a mirror at the bottom of a pool

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

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Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

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How do you get a ninja to do a backflip? Ask him nicely.

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a chinese man pays the full price

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My family is dead

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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