- Anti Joke

that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

Why does Joel's breathe smell?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

Why was a mother crying at a hospital? Because a bird threw a stick at her five minutes ago.

Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? 'Get in the batmobile Robin'

What's the difference between a red ball and a blue ball? There both blue but the red one

What did god say when he saw the first black person? He will do alright for him self

Why don't women bother to have penises? Because they're lazy and they don't care.

roses are red, violates are blue, you left me for David, I am about to kill you bam *bam**bam*

Lol you respond here goood one AAANDEEERS TEN MG PER PILL Asswhipe! Besides friends call me Black Metal, you can call me Nero the avenger. Line kinda broke up with you first, you think she would send you a picture with my finger on her... cough... AND THINK YOU WOULD STILL STIck aROUND WITH HER? Id be more... well glad for your mothers sake, btw, she got me flowers, I wont tell the rest, but she got me another pic... Okay ill tell the rest then, first pic is my fingas, the other is my limpo in her mouth... The third is the funny doctor which caught us and wanted all three of us to be on the pic... Aww, no really man, you had a gem, we where good friends before me and Line, but she did not want to leave before she got me flowers... Aww... Ooooh... Oh! Well not yet but you get the picutre. I got ur message, sure im high as a kite, but I know what im doing if you can "picture" what I mean... Dont tell your mom btw, I want to surprise her, (reverse psychology) hmm, that did I write that? Anyway, how is your sister doing? I dont think she gives those strangely long hugs to anyone but me, and she laughed wen i got a boner... NERO, never call me, never ever call Me black, besides its either Mr.Black, oor black metla you rat! VALIUM? SERIOUSLY? Ill get that test extended you know... Because POISONING!

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

A hooker walks into a bar. She orders a few drinks and leaves. She's a man.

A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

Why didn't the girl get on the school bus? It was Sunday.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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