Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he wanted to impress his wife.

Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was no traffic for miles and the chicken was in search of basic needs.

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

You know what's addicting? Heroine.

Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

How do you get a jewish girls number check her wrist

What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

Why is Satan evil? Because he makes people eat apples.

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

why did the boy die? because he got shot

What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

When did joseph the deer learn to fly? - Never, deer can't fly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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