In this country, you gotta get the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, you get shot the F*** up at the end of Scarface.

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why wouldnt you come to the dark side? i spit in the cookies

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Betty White's wrinkly ass skin.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

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Why are you so gay? Because I am unequivocally attracted to the same sex.

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A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

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if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because it never told anyone. Chickens can't talk.

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

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If life gives you lemons, you are probably suffering from hallucinations.

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why is it good to be a fireman? because they save lives

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Did you ever notice how Bill Nye has a "labrotory" filled with young innocent children? hmmm, very suspicious!

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Why do black guys have big dicks? God felt bad putting pubes on their head

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Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

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How did the dinosaurs die???? How the Heck do I kno?

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Well I would open the freezer.

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I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

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Did the Jewish surgeon charge extra for circumcisions? Nope, he just kept the tips

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops