Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie Thum thump Who's there Bethany Hamilton

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why do leprecon's laugh when they run through the grass? because it tickel's their balls

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Who is big and stupid My brother

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

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Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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What did the korean guy order at the deli? A sandwich

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What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

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YO FACE

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I was relaxing on the beach today when a fat bird came over and said, "Would you rub this lotion into my back please?" "I'm afraid I'm only here for the day," I replied.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

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i have two hands.

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

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My Butthole.

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

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Roses are black Violets are too I am a dog I don't know how to rhyme

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops