What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

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how do you piss off a dyslexic? give him a crossword puzzle

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Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

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How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

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What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Whats black, white, and Asian all at the same time? A panda

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What is the difference between tea pot and shinkansen? shinkansen is very quick train and tea pot is traditional piece of dishes..

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

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Why did we invade Afghanistan? Because we hate arabs.

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Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

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What did the Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know. I can't speak Chinese.

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What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

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In Kentucky...your grandmother rapes you.

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CHORGLUND

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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why did the black man jump higher than the white man he was on a trampoline

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How did the guy who's been in his mothers basement for 20 years lose his virginity? He didn't, that's where his mother hid his body.

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A man walks into a bar so how many Jews were there when a man called Wellard ate a pizza. Balloons

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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