What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

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A man walks into a haunted house and screams. He had arrows on a nail.

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Today, my friend threw a lemon at me very hard and hit me in the testicles. FML

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Q:how do confuse courtney A: give her a beer

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In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

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I created darkness. God created the stars. God created the bee. I created the wasp. God created the child. I banged your mother. Moral: Soon my wings of darkness shall destroy your very own star, these words seem empty now, so I will fill them with true meaning and purpose as I will give the same to you the day the sky brightens no more.

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Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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What is hitlers favorite planet: jewpiter

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What do you call a black man in a truck A driver

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why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

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What do dogs and whales have in common? They both live in the ocean. Apart from the dog.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

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How do you kill a vampire? You can't because vampires aren't real.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Well it depends how many of them can figure out the staircase.

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whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? being wrongly accussed of a crime you didnt commit because of your race, and being put on death row

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Doctor doctor, I feel like listening to good music. Looks like you need "The Cure" to help with this.

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How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a statue of Mitt Romney? The statue doesn't change its position.

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Whats slower than molasses? A dead baby.

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how do you boil oil? add b to oil

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why am I writing this...im bored

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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