Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you kill a Jew? The same way you kill any person. It could be gunshot, strangulation, hanging, poison etc. They are the same as every other human being, so you would kill them just like any other human being.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock, Knock Why did you just say knock knock?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

My friend billy had a ten foot.... Garden hose. Upon showing it to the neighbour next door he hit it with a rake which significantly shortened it and subsequently had to buy another

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock knock? Who's there? Cancer Cancer who? After some time and various bouts of radiation and chemotherapy, he finally lost his life to the terrible disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what's the difference between a box of dead babies and a corvette? I don't have a corvette in my garage!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the heart surgeon say to the brain surgeon? We are both surgeons

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many Caucasian American males does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the red-haired barber say to the father who abandoned him at birth? Nothing. The father sat to the side and read a magazine as the barber cut the hair of his legitimate child, failing to recognize the irony of the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a mulsim that tattles on you for vandilising muslim propaganda Target Practice

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why was it funny that the boy got hairspray for christmas because he had leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock Who’s there? Boo Boo who? Ah don’t be sad, Boo’s here to cheer you up!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you make a baby stop crying? You slit it's throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

This is my first joke don't ????mine. You did didn't you.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What starts with P and ends with orn? Porn

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your pathetic humanity. Deux. Dios Gud God etc. Moral: You cannot even translate the name of his very being correctly, and you expect the bible to be translated right... Laught now, because I shall silence you soon enough...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why can't black people be in a talent show? Because they'll steal the show.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops