What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

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A: We're eating you for breakfast today. B: Thank you, I'll have my arm.

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how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

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why did joe drown ? he had no arms

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how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

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Whats 10 times worse than a war? Ten wars.

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like this joke for a free ipod nano or a dead baby ?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered eight's family.

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How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

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Wanna know something funny? Your face

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Im thinking of a very long word..... L O N G

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I had a date. She was a pegasister. Since MLP was magical, I disappeared.

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How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

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Why Was Did Jill Cross The Road? She Needed To Get To Work.

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A handicapp walks into a bar

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Did i just hear a joke about birds? No? Well this is Hawkward.

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What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? Although being a much easier potential victim, no one has raped the mentally challenged man.. yet.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

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so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

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A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

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look in the sky! its a bird, its a plane........ Its Miles

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. The man was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral service.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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