Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 witnessed while hiding in a closit 7 rape and kill his mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Why did the man buy Trojan for his women? It's condom curtsey.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

what did bob say to joey, nothing joey's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +46

why did the plane crash? the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Violets are red. Roses are blue. I am drunk, and i'm about to spew.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

a black and a mexican are walking down the street, two cops look up to see this and immediately say "shit, this can't be good".

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Jack and Jill went up the hill. Jill was dehydrated.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

An unarmed man robbed a bank today, he failed because he had no way of carrying the cash out.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Roses are red Violets are blue If you came 'cause GameGrumps Fuck you.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

thumb_up thumb_down +40

why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: That question doesn't make any sense.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

i don't get it...none of these are funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

*knock knock* "who's there?" "me, the person who knocked..duh"

thumb_up thumb_down +38

why did your parents die? because I thought it was funny...

thumb_up thumb_down +36

The dyslexic man called the black man a ginger.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops