Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

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Everyone knows a sandwich made with bacon, lettuce, and tomato is a BLT, but what do you call a sandwich made with tomato, bacon, and lettuce? A BLT.

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knock knock. come in.

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I slipped and fell in the shower today. Good thing my dad caught me

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

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What do you call 5 of my friends and 5 of your friends hanging out together? I don't know. I don't have any friends.

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What time is it? 20:45.

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What's long, black, and sticky? Licorice.

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She said no

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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A Jewish guy walked into a bar... and said "ow"

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how do you decrease the unemployment figures? abolish lidle, aldi, and netto

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there are some things i dont get. Quantum Physics is one of them.

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a chicken walks into terry's house he penetrates himn

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what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

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A black man walks into a bar and treated with equal care

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a date-rapist

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Nicole Ritchie walks into a grocery store.

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How do you escape prison? Kill everyone in it hen once you have escaped find their families and viciously murder them. Are they going the send you back to prison? No because you will kill everyone.

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Billy Cundiff.

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Whats similar between a grape and a duck? They're both purple. except not the duck.

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roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

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An Irishman walks out of a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops