What did the door say to the hand? Please stop caressing me!

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A three and a half foot tall clown walks into a bar, it is quickly learned that he is only 8 years old and is excorted out by security.

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Did y'all see Lafell catch that pass? Neither did I

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Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

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How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

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A man walks into a bar. ouch.

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What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

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What do you call a man who is dirty, and is searching through a pile of garbage? A man who threw out his divorce papers.

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A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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what do a parrot and a hippo have in common? i want to kill every non white human being!!!!

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

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Spell: “This word”

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My sister had a lemonade stand once. And one time, she spilled.

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So there were two... sigh... I hate my life....

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Michael Hoffman leaves the gym

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What is worse then a worm in your apple? 2 worms in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cos it wanted to.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

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Did you hear about the kid-napping in Minnesota? He woke up

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Spotto

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Four blondes are driving to Disney World. When they are in Florida, there is a sign that says "Disney left" Upset, they make a u-turn and go home.

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Why did the paraplegic die in a fire? He couldn't get down the stairs.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops