a man walks into a bar... it was a crow-bar

What do you call a dog with no legs? Max

What happened to those who survived the attack on Hiroshima? They were killed in Nagasaki

Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

What did the feminist say to the CIS white male? I respect you as a person.

Why did the boys uncle stop calling him? His uncle died of cancer 3 months ago.

Q: Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: She had no arms... Q: Knock Knock! Q: Who's there? A: NOT SARA! --- Q: Okay... What song does Sara sing to her arms? A: Somebody That I Used To Know... --- Now. If you're happy and you know it clap your... nevermind O_O

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding! Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

What is grey and smells like sand? A Rock.

What is black and white and red all over? A Zebra that has been fatally maimed by a hungry lion.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

how many babies does it take to paint a house? that is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

What did the suicide bomber say on new years day? Happy new year.

How do you lose your train of thought? You can't. It is impossible to fit a full size locomotive in the human skull.

A baby seal walks into a club.

A white person at Harvard

The Pope, Queen Elizabeth and a schoolboy are on a plane that is going to crash. It crashes and they all die instantly.

What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

Whats the quickest way to a woman's heart? A bilateral incision on the upper left region of the sternum.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back. And 6 million in the ashtray

Your momma's so stupid that she was declared mentally retarded by her doctors.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...