A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

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" Hey you have something on your face. " ( man speaking punches the guy he was talking to ) " It was pain."

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

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What did the man with Tourette's say to the other man? Surely something he did not mean to say.

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why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

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Hey i just met u And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met u

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What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

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Why was baby Johnny crying because a monkey came and ripped of his dick

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What's red and screams? A peeled baby in a bag of salt.

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What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

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And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Enough with the "whats worse than ... "jokes! They are getting old and have a millon different possible answers. I am aware that this is not a joke but thumbs up if you aggree with.

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Whats worse then finding TWO worms in your apple? The Holocaust, it was pretty bad.

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What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kidnap his family.

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

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Yo mamma so mexican she brought tacos to the dinner table

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A black man says "ask" correctly.

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Do you have emotional issues, ever have a really bad day and just wanna talk call this number (402-314-5287) < N1GGER

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YES! EXACTLY!

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involved parents.

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" "It's who's." The grammar nazi has struck again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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