What do Japan and Haiti have in common? They are both islands.

What did the orphan get on his birthday? Cancer.

nick biggs ate a car well his name is nick BIGGS

What do you get when you put white cheese in a blender and turn it on? White cheese.

What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

Why did the teenager cross the road? To get an abortion.

The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

row row row your boat gently down the stream rape

Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't. She's dead.

Why are spanish people good at soccer? Hard work and a long-life time comitment

There once was a man in Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He awoke with a fright In the middle of the night To find that someone was breaking into his house

A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

How do you know your sister is on her period? - Your dad´s dick tastes like blood.

Yo mamas so stupid that she received slightly below average in her latest maths test

(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

What does a blond see when she looks at a dog? A four legged mammal, refered to as canis lupus familiaris, or what is commonly known as a dog.

Whats easier to fit in a trunk, babies or concrete bricks? Babies because you can hit them with a pitchfork.

Your momma's so stupid, her IQ is below average.

Why did the man name his son David? He didn't. It was his wife's choice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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