"What do you call a man who has bumblebee wings and fire for blood?" (The doctor on the other line has no answer. Tom desperately weeps into the phone, trying to grasp his sudden transformation. He finds no reassurance, and hangs up the phone.)

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What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

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Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

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What happened to the man who jumped into a puddle? He contracted hypothermia due to the low temperatures of the water. He died the next day.

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Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm blind.

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Q-What do you call kids who go to school? A- Students.

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What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

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Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

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Why was the black man put in jail? Because he escaped.

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Person 1: Can I write a good anti-joke? Person 2: No. Person 1: Why nut? Person 2: All the gud onez r taken. ;-; tru...

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there are two kinds of people in this world: those who like anit jokes and those who don't

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Homosexuals are gay.

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What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

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how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

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pickle juice?

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What's a pirate's favorite color? Depends on the pirate.

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A doctor is delivering a baby on April fool's day. He says, "Congradulations, it's a boy." He then says,"April fools! Your child was stillborn."

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Why did the boy lose his watch? Who cares? It was a shitty-ass watch.

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What did one cannibal set to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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JUSTIN BIEBER PERFUME!

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We are lawyers

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A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

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Spotto

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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