Why couldn't Sally ride a bicycle? She doesn't have a bicycle. She also doesn't have legs.

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What's worse than falling on concrete? Being eaten by futuristic mutant trees in a volcano

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Whats worse than a Jew Ben rike

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Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

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Why can't Helen Keller hear or talk straight? Because she's dead

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What did Pikachu tell Ash? "Pikachu."

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your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

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why did one crayon give another crayon the silent treatment? because they are crayons, unable to speak

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Roses are red That much is true But violets are purple Not freaking blue

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

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there's 4 men, a rabbi, a priest, a monk, and a captain. they all go on the captain's ship for a cruise with a couple hundred people. this was during the cold war, and the ship was mistaken for a war ship, and the russians missled it. the monk says: "we have to get everyone off the ship!" the rabbit say: "NO! the women and children need to get off first! And we should also hail to Satan!" the Captain says: "OMG! It's a talking Rabbit!" the priest then stops the rabbit to death!" the rabbi says: "The rabbit is right! But just the children!" The Captain says: "Screw the children! this ship is going to Hell, we have talking animals saying we should worship the devil!" the priest says: "Do you think we have time" the monk, the rabbi, and the captain stare and beat him to death.... "Well, he was already going to Hell" the Monk says. But during this entire time the ship has been sinking and another missle blows up the ship. Everyone dies, except for Sean Conery...and Chuck Norris.

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Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

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Q: What time do you see a Chinese dentist? A: Never because China has a flawed healthcare system due to overpopulation. It is a sad and sobering reality of the plight of the Chinese citizens.

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

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Joe used to always talk about his family and his two wonderful kids Joe can no longer talk to or about his family because his smoking habits have gotten out of control

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? You have HIV.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A bag of burning crap.

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What did the Muslim have under his hood of his car? A V-8 engine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a truck.

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Why did little Timmy start crying? Because he was shot.

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why did helen cellars dog runway. you would to if ur name was ujujujujjujujujujujj

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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