Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, a dead baby is a horrible sight and shouldn't be laughed at.

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How do you finish your homework? Get your dog to eat it.

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Maturity is a virtue.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the hospital? A: The victim of a violent mob attack

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOUR MOM! Me: -is dead.

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Q: Why doesn't Micheal Jackson have orgasms? A: Because he's dead.

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how do you get someone out of a chair? hit him with a shovel

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Why didn't the boy have any toes? - Because he did not have any legs.

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What is worse than having sex with a dead baby in front of it's mother? Not a lot.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

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why was there a man outside the 56th floor window? he was a window washer and needed the money.

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Holocaust jokes are not funny. My Grandpa died in the Holocaust... He fell off of the guard tower.

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Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

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what do you call a mixbreed of a bull dog and a shitzu? a sharpei

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I like my women the way I like my coffee: Without a penis.

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Knock, knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest!

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Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

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24!

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Because I'm colorblind

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A man has only two fingers on one hand, and everybody calls him two-fingered Mike. Why? Because his fingers were lost in a tragic accident at birth, and his parents, who were considering calling him Mike, decided to lengthen the name because it seemed appropriate.

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What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane? There's no such thing. 500,000 people can't fit onto one plane.

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what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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