Why do you go to a black mans yardsale? To buy something cheap. Why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because it is illegal.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

jack shine and keiran = nate robinson

How do you kill a 6'5 black man in a dark alley? Stab him 3 times in the appendix with a 12 inch blade.

Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

A brown haired girl and a blonde girl are driving through a cornfield. Because of this illegal activity, they are sent to court and given 8 years in the state prison.

An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

Q: What is the differenc between a Jew and a boy scout? A: The boy scout comes back from camp.

Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Joe Joe who? Your friend Joe OK come in

Did you hear about the couple that met in a revolving door? They died.

Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

Q: What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? A: Drowning.

What would be worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts.

Guy 1: "Hey do you want to hear a joke?" Guy 2: "Sure" Guy 1: "No."

Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

i died. new product by steve jobs. also presenting icoffin, and next year icoffin 2. slightly slimmer with a lock button to keep zombies out.

doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

What do u call a short Mexican Nothing that's normal

How do you confuse an idiot? By confusing an idiot.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Baby you think i loved you, but you got played too

What job did the black man apply for?.. Several, its a downward economy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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