Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate to laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to get away from KFC, which was directly behind him.

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Why did Jimmy go to the doctor? He had just been hit by a semi truck and his legs were severed. He died later that night.

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Whats worse than than falling in a puddle on the way to a meeting? Getting shot while your at that meeting.

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What did the greeter at walmart say to the black man? Welcome to walmart.

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OK, so there's this blonde driving down the road in her brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 Lamborghini. She's cruisin' about 95, radio blaring, having a great time. She comes up on this trucker who is carrying a double-wide home and is taking up both lanes. To her disliking, he is only going about 45. To get the point across that she wants to get past, she decides to tailgate him. So, she gets to within a foot of his rear bumper. The trucker looks back and sees her on his ass, and motions for her to get off of it, but to her it looks like a wave and she waves back. Since her first attempt was futile, she decided to get a little closer and begin flashing her headlights, hopefully making herself more visible in the process. Once again the trucker sees her on his ass, and this time motions for her to pull over to the side of the road. The trucker steps out of his vehicle with a chunk of chalk and draws a circle three feet in diameter in the middle of the road. He instructs her not to move until he tells her to. Naive as she was, she agrees to it and steps inside it. The trucker goes back to his truck and pulls out a 50-ounce Louisville Slugger. He walks over to the Lamborghini and beats it, and beats it, and beats it again. When he is done, all that is left is a brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 pile of metal. Satisfied, he throws the bat in his truck and walks over to the blonde. When he gets there, to his astonishment, she is rolling around on the street laughing hysterically. He asks her, "Why are you laughing? I just beat the crap out of your car!!" She is laughing too hard to respond, but between giggles he can make out, "While you weren't looking I stepped out of the circle."

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy i suck at rhyming door knob

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what is cooler than writing an anti joke? killing eveybody who thinks the " my garden is on fire" joke is funny

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Yes. Just Yes.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

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Tom has 24 cupcakes Tom then ate 24 cupcakes what does Tom have? Diabetes Tom got diabetes

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dur dur dur dur said the child born during an earthquake

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what do you call a black man on tv? an actor

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

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Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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Rabid squirrels attacked Blake's face as winged pickles perched on Phoebe's hair.

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This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

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Why are black people so good at sports? They practice.

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Women have the right to vote.

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How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

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Q. Why did the girl with no legs fall off her bike? A. Somebody threw a refrigerator at her.

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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