Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

how now brown cow. WTF.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

Why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off. haha its funny

What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them..

what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

Your mother is so rotund, in fact she went to a weight loss clinic... but gained weight

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Nock Nock. Whose there? The chicken.

How do u get an A in algebra? Train a possum.

If your South American in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom? European ( your a pee an)

yfygcugyuyc

Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought the second one would have ducked.

if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

Good to know tattletale, I remember hating you back then when you betrayed me, but I cant wait to meet you again. Anyway Nero, I am a girl, its not about sex with me, I just had to tell you, and hope you will take better care of yourself, I know you used to be worried about your looks, and I just want you to understand ill be there for you no matter what. Thanks for the kind words Nero, I know you mean them, you never hid the fact that you found me attractive, but while I did not understand then why you would ruin every nice moment by saying something cheesy or rude, I think I get it now... I know you need rest, but can I arrive as soon as possible? Ill just wait outside or something, I wont be a bother I promise.

Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

WHO the FUK are Waseem ? and Jess ??!!!!

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

What has wings, is bald, and can't fly? A bald eagle. I lied about the part where it can't fly.

Q: What's white, black, and red all over? A: The yellow brick road

You're momma's so fat, Oh wait. She's not.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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