Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Lack of experience.

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Ouch.

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What's worse than having a bad hair day? Vietnam.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? It's not. Numbers are not living organisms and thus are incapable of experiencing emotion.

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the creepy man across the block.

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What did the greeter at walmart say to the black man? Welcome to walmart.

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Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

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If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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There is a cat with a collar animal control takes of the coller and and says who cares it's not Our fault there cat is an outdoor cat the girl who lost her cat was crying all year long spending all her money wishing for her cat back and wishing that there was no such thing as animal control That girl was me and I'm against animal control

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If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

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A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

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What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

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Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

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Why are hookers and babies so alike? You can have sex with both.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow Jones.

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What is red and does not cry? Half a baby.

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what do you call a man who makes fun of womens rights? Single

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What do you call a pelican with no wings? A dead pelican

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Q: what do you call a muslim driving a plane? I don't know A: 9/11

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Whats worse than a little kid falling. Him getting vigorously raped by his father every night.

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Stop being a centipede

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The man with a long history of Alzheimer's once said: Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cheese n' toast

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "Yes" the man replies, because he is aware that the bartender wasn't actually asking if the day way long, but rather if the day was hard.

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You momma's so ugly your dad left her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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