What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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White people talk like this 'HEY' Black people talk like this 'YO' Hundreds of thousands died in the civil war.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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What do you call a pregnant 8-year old? A poor reflection on our society

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PFF! I hate that shit XD not saying that claymation cant be art, but that Plonsters or whatever is just something I dragged out of my head.

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Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

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why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The road was Catholic, and it couldn't cross itself.

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fack me!

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Why did the man have blood on his finger? Because he popped a pimple

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What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

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What did Michael Jackson think when someone threw a tomato off his head? The same as he was thinking before it happened, because everything that goes through Michael Jackson's head is pornographic images.

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Want to hear a dead baby joke? Abortion

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What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians? A groupie.

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How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

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69

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If you analyze this joke closely you' ll realize its not funny.

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A black man walks in to a bar, and is promptly escorted from the premises, for being under the age of 21

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If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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How are Polish people and dogs the same? They aren't. One is a human being, and one is a dog. Do not be stupid.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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