Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

Knock knock! Who's there? Elton. Elton who? Elton John

Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jewish people aren't edible.

when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

why did the baby cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken -written by sion dafydd jones, uk

What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

Whats worse than 12 babys stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 12 trees!

No. Yes.

Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

You are short with no perm, you will never be Kat Willams.

whats da difference between a black people and grass. there both black except for the grass.

Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

Snooki want smoosh smoosh

What happened to Emma? I raped her!

Nipples+poop= good stuff. Hellllll yeaaahhhh

What did the black man get on his SAT's? -Barbecue sauce

Q:What did the hillbilly say when he lost his tractor? A: Where is my tractor

Q: How do you stop a Mexican tank? A: Ask politely.

Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

Whats blue and flies? A suffocating baby strapped to a fan.

A man walks into a bar and says, "Ow."

whats beter than a dead pile of babies? the alive one that has to eat its way out

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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