maddie latino

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

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a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

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A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ...an owl with a bungee cord.

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What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this dock and it makes me wana quack like what the hell is THAT!

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Why was the kid underwater? He hit a rock.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he was angry and frustrated with the people in his life, and the ringing clock was the first thing he noticed in his depressed rage.

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want to go home? yea

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qg6AkhIYVs

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whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

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a man walked out of church and said F***!

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How did the chicken cross the road? He went to the crosswalk so all the cars had to stop for him.

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guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

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YOLO

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Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

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What's worse than dropping your phone in the toilet? Drinking only milk and honey for 7 days and then getting diarrhea while lying chained up completely naked with red fire ants going up your anus and all over your body while you get eaten alive in slow painfully miserable death

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing because muffins can't talk. The other muffin replied, 'What an odd conversation starter!'

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Why did the man drop his wallet? Because his palms were sweaty from a long, happy day at the beach with his family after moving into there new home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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