interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

Shltskc gw? G

Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

How did the man die? He was killed alive.

You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...