Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

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What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

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What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

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Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

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why did the shark bite the surf board? It thought it was turtle.

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Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

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2 Scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for H20, and the second one asks for H20 too. They both enjoy a refreshing glass of water.

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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how do you find will smith in the snow? look for his teeth

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How many stripes are there on a policeman's socks? None, policemen must wear regulation plain black socks.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

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Q.How many dinosaur species can jump as high as a house? A.All of them, houses can't jump

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a cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. the cat is then escorted out of the bar because a cat in a bar is unsanitary. and they do not serve milk.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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