What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

What is funnier than 24 69

What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his village.

What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

Q. what do you call mexican stoners A. baked beans

An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

Roses are red, violetes are red, I'm colorblind

What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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