A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney Loves you.

Son: Dad what does it mean to f***? Dad: Jimmy! don't use that kind of language.. use the word chainsaw instead. Son: Ok, well what does it mean to chainsaw? Dad: Well as you know, God created people, he started with Adam and eve and then he- Son: You keep referring to god as a he, are you suggesting that God has a penis? I guess that would explain the big bang theory... right? get it? Dad: ... Go chainsaw yourself, Jimmy.

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

Knock-knock jokes with sjws: Knock knock! Who's there? A transgender! A transgender who? WOW. It's 2016, people. If you can't recognize a transgender, you're a disgusting piece of cis white male scum! OH! OHH! "I'm sorry lady"? Do I LOOK like a lady to you? I'm a- no- sir- stop interrupting me. SIR! I identify as a gender fluid demisexual! "What does that matter?" Oh my god. Well it wouldn't matter if I identified as a goddamn piece of salami to you would it??? Huh? I'm confusing you? WOW! What a priveleged- oh! So I'M being rude? OKAY! FINE! I'm recording this you know. You're going ALL over the Internet. Oh yes you are! No, hey, my privilege cam! You just took it this is rape! You are assaulting me! Don't just shove it back into my hands like that! I call patriarchy! Oh no, I'm not done with you! Don't you close that door you Goddamn piece of sh- *slam*

Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

a man makes a bad joke

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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