why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

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My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

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Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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Why did the Muslim kill a gay guy? Because the gay guy was threatening his family with a gun.

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How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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Jovan

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DEATH.

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knock knock whose there? i don't know...

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What do a blonde and a good beer have in common? They both go down easy.

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So, a Turtle, a Giraffe, and a Hippopotamus walk into Stop-N-Shop. They are quickly excorted out and the Zoo is contacted to take the wild animals. The Manager wonders why they were there in the first place.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Q: You know what's really funny? A: A good joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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