Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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Albert, there is a dead, FLY in your hair.

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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Knock knock Who's there? Justin Bieber OH MY GOD REALLY?! No.

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Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

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Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Roses are red viloets are blue mw3 sucks and bf3 is good

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if you have a name/nickname/brand/version or number, please like this anti joke

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

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Why was the man sad? His brother died.

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

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How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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