roses are red ur face is too and if u r hot my penis is going in u

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What's worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The holoca- *the man hearing the joke then pulls out a desert eagle and shoots the man in the chest before finishing the joke then goes to jail for the rest of his life*

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So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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if there is a circle of fat people and you throw a cookie in the middle of the circle. It will be the best game of hungry hungry hippos you will ever see.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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A black person dies.

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What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

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why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

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why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

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What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

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A man told this joke once... it wasn't funny.

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what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

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One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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Adam Chebali is awesome

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

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whats black, then white, then dead all over? Michael jackson

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yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

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How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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