Q; How does a priest perform an exorcism? A: He doesn't.

Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

whats the diffrences between black people and a tire nothin

Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Why wasn't the unplugged computer on?

=3

What do you call a man who has a camera? a cameraman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...