why didn't the boy go to school because he died last night

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

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How do you starve a Somalian? Too late.

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Why did little tomas cry? Because he got raped by his uncle

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

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one morning i turned on my tv

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What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

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Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

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What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

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Why does Michael J Fox have such good handwriting? Through years of hardwork, perseverance, and rehabilitation.

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why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One's For You!! :D

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Where does a successful black person live? Neverland.

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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What's worse than holocaust jokes? The Rwandam Genocide.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops