Why did the elephant cross the road? It was being poached

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What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

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What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

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knock knock no no you go now i clean

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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why did the boy fall of his bike He got shot in the face

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I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver comes into the bar and gulps down the guys drink and the guy starts crying the lorry driver says "dont cry ill buy you another" thee guy sas "it's not that today i woke up late for work and when i got there i got fired and then when i went to go home feeling depressed my car doesnt startand so i walk home and i find my wife in bed with the gardener and so i came here to die but you drank my poison"

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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What made Qtip's so dangerous? Q-tip's music

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says "It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave"

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The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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