My mom says hi ............ Jk she says hello

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A vampire sees a werewolf at a bar, aware of the upcoming brawl between them two, the bartender shoots them both in the head but it's okay because neither of them exist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

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The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

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what is the diference between my left tit and my right tit .... my right one was cut off because of breast cancer

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She likes her sex like she likes her penises. Without a woman.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am white and I like cold food

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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What do all homosexuals have in common? Not much.

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What did the paper towel say to the tomato? Nothing.

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

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why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

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I think everybody should have a penis. Does that make me a bad feminist?

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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What did the robot say to the boy? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and started to strangle the boy. The authorities tried to get the robot to stop but robots are too strong. When the robot had killed the boy, it self destructed.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops