A woman is shopping at a grocery store. She picks up a half gallon of skim milk, 2 loaves of wheat bread, one dozen organic eggs, and some carrots. She goes to the checkout line. "You must be single." the clerk says. Amazed at the flattering insight of the clerk, the woman says, "Yes I am. How could you tell?". "Because you're ugly".

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.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

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Have you heard the joke about the cat? No Are you kitten me

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Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

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a jew, a muslim and a christian all walk into a bar; because of the difference in religion im afraid such an event is unlikely to occur in the future.

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edmond alward. handyman services. call 0858430803.

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What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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Why was the little boy crying? Because his older brother was forcing him to pee on an electrical socket.

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Mary- Hey Dallas, do you have a suitcase? Dallas- Yeah, why? Mary- I need a suitcase

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Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

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Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

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Why did the black man walk into the white house? Cause he lives there because he is our president

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Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

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How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

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A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

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Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

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"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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