why did the white man walk into the bar? He was thirsty

A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

Why did the black man buy a gun? because he wanted to go hunting.

what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

What did the bacon say to Sam's eggs? Why are you green?

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

Quinn Grifith Randel lives in Roswell, GA

Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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