Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

Loperson

Why am I telling you this joke? Because I entered the following, agreed to the Terms of Service, and clicked "submit".

How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

What's brown and slimy? brown slime

A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

how many cody's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? impossible he so stupid!!!

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

What's black and white and red all over? The color spectrum. Along with other colors.

What is the difference between a Nigga and a bucket of shit? ....The bucket.

What do you call someone who kills a black person? A cop

Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

poopy is poopy

A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

Do you want to hear some bad news? My wife just died Do you want to hear some good news? I'm single

there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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