- Anti Joke

What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

whats annoying and won't go away?. Aids.

If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

Why didn't the politically-correct lawyer laugh at his black neighbour's jokes? He had an incapacitating malady of oralfacialoaralysis rendering him unable to laugh or smile

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 brutally raped and murdered 32.

You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

Rex Ryans foot fetish was honer by Mark Sanchez when he threw the ball at his teammates feet.

Whats worse than getting a parking ticket? The Bubonic Plague

In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, “You must be single.” The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict’s intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said “Well, you know what, you’re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?” The drunk replied, “Cause you’re ugly.”

What did the boy eat for dinner? Shit.

What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat? Nothing, it is impossible to mix 2 different animals

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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