How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

What's the difference between a white guy playing basketball and a black guy playing hockey??? There is none..they hardly get playing time!!

Why did the little boy throw a clock out of the window? Because he wanted to break it.

Whats 9 plus 10? 19

A dyslexic man walked into a bra

Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

What's better than finding a $5.00 bill on the floor? Finding the person who actually owns it.

I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 pounds. My girlfriend was a fatass. Wasn't gonna make that mistake again when I found a woman to marry.

How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was suicidal.

What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal, and this wasn't just any road. It was the new highway built, with frequent traffic jams and a speed limit of 90 mph.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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